Awful Jokes
Jokes donated or written by our staff and customers that are neither seasonal or necessarily funny.
A piece of string walks into a pub, Landlord said “ Are you the same piece of string that came in last night ?” No I’m a frayed knot ! (Thanks John - not his real name)
Two Drummers Daughters Hanna 1, Hanna 2
What do you call a fish with no eye ?? Fsh
The new pope is crazy about cats, I know that because I read he was a cataholic.
I'm into snail racing.. my mate said if I took the shell off it would go faster. If anything it was more Sluggish...
Ship carrying blue paint collides with ship carrying red paint - yes, both crews are believed to be marooned..
I used to be in a pop group called the Hinges.... We wern't bad, at our peak we supported the Doors..
I was photographed with R.E.M. the other week.... That's me in the corner..
I went to the fridge to get out some Evaporated milk. I opened the tin and it was gone.
What do you call panic-buying of sausage and cheese in Germany? The wurst-kase scenario
Nail Salons, hair salons, waxing centres and tanning places are closed. It’s about to get ugly out there
Terrible news from the North Sea - Cargo Ship carrying Yo yo's from China sank..... 15 times.
Is a fake Noodle an impasta ?
Stationary shop - Moves
Buddist to hot dog seller - Make me one with everything
Tin man run over by Steam Roller - Curses Foil again
Line of Rabbits running backwards - Receeding Hare line.
What to you call a woman with only one leg - Eileen
Apology written in dots and dashes - Re Morse Code
I told my wife she drew her eyebrows way too high - She looked at me all surprised
Forest Gumps' Password - 1Forest1
Bought my wife a fridge for Christmas - Can't wait to see her face light up when she opens it
Scientists reveal why Ants dont get Coronovirus - too many Antibodies.
I sued the airport for loosing my luggage, needless to say, I lost my case
My Journalist friend wrote a recipe book recently - It was useless, he never revealed his sauces.
What did the puppy want to be when he grew up ? - A barkiologist
How do coffe beans say goodbye? - See you later percolator.
When a Goldfish gets old does it loose its G ?
I just saw Roy Rogers driving his Audi Partner
Is a talkative chineese chef a Jabber Wocky ?
My friends John & Julie Amanger have had a son, they've called him Wayne..
Is a hiding a bell you just can't reach ?
Is an Antelope to run off with your mum's sister?
If you disappear are you being rude to a Lord ?
Is an Implication a cream for sick elves ?
Is a Wallaby an aspiring Kangaroo ?
I used to have a fear of Speed Bumps - But Im slowly getting over it..
Dom is starting a chewingum recylcing business he needs a little help to get it off the ground.
My mate has done really well as a tree surgeon - he now has branches everywhere.
A friend of mine is addicted to brake fluid, he denies it, he says he can stop anytime.
